PG- Parental Guidance; Not!

I'm back. Not that Theresa read my entry from yesterday and thinks I'm doing an OK job, but because she wants an entry and can't do it herself yet. It's one of the few things I can do for her right now. I'm scrambling, looking for something to make her feel better, and I can't even give her the big hug I know we both need because I know it will hurt her. We saw her tonight and she looks so much better than yesterday. Her room's temp has been adjusted several times and seems more comfortable. They gave her an ice pack for her neck to keep her cooler. Her dosage on the pain meds has been increased. She was sipping ice water and sucking on ice chips. Her arms are pretty bruised and her hands are swollen, but she is my beautiful girl. Quiet grace and dignity even in this surreal situation. She really does look and seem more peaceful today. I know she saw Ellie and Nick this afternoon and I think that eased her heart. She was out of bed and walking this afternoon and then spent some time in a chair. She says she's very slow; I think it's remarkable that she got around as much as she did today. I'm glad Kate was with her last night. That whole idea of being alone and in pain is so hard for me...I'm relieved she had human warmth for that long 1st night. There has been talk of Tree being released midweek. I know she would be out of there tomorrow if she could. Let's keep those thoughts and prayers for a speedy recovery going.

We raised both of the girls to be strong, independent women. I've watched them work through very difficult situations. I watched both of them give birth. I can tell you they are very strong women. A few days ago Tree said she was scared of the unknown. Aren't we all? I guess the thing is not to have fear. Theresa really worked to educate herself, and us, on every aspect of this disease and treatment. Knowledge is power. But there are those elements that we just can't prepare for, the unknown...that's the scary part. At some point you just have to take that big leap of faith and hope it all works out. Theresa took that leap yesterday and I hope that minute by minute she finds things to be a little more controllable and a little less scary. As parents we comfort, protect, and shelter, but I'm finding I'm so deficient in my ability to do that right now. I guess this is where I count on Theresa to remain strong. We'll be there to offer support, love and whatever is within our capabilities, but we ultimately count on her strength. So maybe you can add some extra thoughts and prayers to help keep Tree strong.

As for the kids...they spent the day with Uncle Dean. They went to the Lincoln Park Zoo and the Shedd Aquarium. Theresa has a great photo of the three of them at the Shedd on her windowsill. They all look happy...OK, Nick is sticking his tongue out, but that seems to be one of his new happy, crazy looks! Rob took them up to see Tree this afternoon. She said they both took their time taking in all of the surroundings. Nick was partial to the buttons of course. Rob was concerned that Ellie didn't seem to connect with Theresa. I'm not concerned. I think it's her strength. Her self protection. They're going to Church in the morning and will get to see Tree afterwards. I hope it's a little more relaxed for all of them.

I'm up much later than Theresa, so for those of you who read her blog right after the nightly news, I'm sorry. I'm closing this post asking you to join me in visualizing Theresa's healthy body, speedy recovery, and a new happy, normal Theresa, whatever that may be. Paula