I could not fall asleep last night - I was not tired - probably from the extra coffee with lunch but I was still awake at 2. Needless to say, it was another night on the couch. Rob came down a bit before 6:30 to get to work and he said both the kids were awake upstairs. I went up and we had bed time cuddles together until around 7 - then they climbed out and went to play in Nick's room. We all went down for breakfast, I started the coffee going and Ellie got her backpack together. We all got dressed and Ellie walked to the bus stop - Nick and I headed to Mom's by way of the bakery. We picked out chocolate sprinkle donuts for Nick and Tony and apricot and cherry danish for Mom and me - they were already out of chocolate danish by 9 in the morning.
The boys played very nicely with the trains today and Tony was very nice and shared his Dash engine with Nick. I read through my new magazine and made note of a few possible gift items. While Mom made the boys lunch I took them on a leaf finding excursion but since Mom's house is only 3 houses away from the park we ended up there for a bit. Tony swung in the swing for a while and Nick just ran and made a whole bunch of noise. I said let's go back and Nick was out on the sidewalk walking back but Tony would not leave the park - I had to carry him kicking and screaming all the way back.
Mom had the boys lunch fixed so nice and with a little help Nick ate the majority of it. We started to have meltdown time so Nick and I went home and played here until Ellie got home. I had placed a call into Margaret this morning to ask about numbing agent for Tuesday - 1st infusion chemo. I got a message back from her this afternoon saying that she had called the prescription into the Kellogg pharmacy - ugh - I had really hoped she would had called it into Target. After we got Ellie from the bus we filled up water bottles and made a quick stop by Christi's to drop off Susannah's coat and then went to Kellogg. I found a street spot on Central and I took it - it is ridiculous that they charge $4.00 to just run in and pick up a prescription. It was getting cooler but I looked at the walk as prep for tomorrow. Katee, the pharmacist, always has a jar of candy and today she had it filled with Smartees - the reward for being good.
We got gas on the way back home and Rob was already home when we arrived. The kids went downstairs to play and Rob and I had some time to visit. Ellie and I were trying to decide what we wanted to eat tonight - Ellie asked for a hot dog - ugh! We phoned in an order and Rob went to pick it up. We had dinner and the kids went back to play and I went to work gathering everything Ellie and I will need for tomorrow morning. I have a pile of clothing for each of us on the table and hats and gloves for the early morning and water bottles are filled.
I picked away the last of the liquid bandage this afternoon and I was pleasantly surprised to see that the bandage had made the incisions both look so much worse than they actually are. Now on the naked skin the collarbone incision is not so noticeable - the port - well that still looks Halloweenish - I have started applying scar cream. I talked to Margaret again - I wanted to know what I should do/not do in preparation for Tuesday. I was told to really focus on keep hydrated, to eat a good breakfast on Tuesday, to take an ativan on my way in and to prep with the lidocaine gel. Margaret is off next week but Julia will be taking care of me - she said to expect the first infusion to be the longest -plan on 5-6 hours. Margaret said what hits people the most is nausea and coldness - plan to dress in layers and we will figure things out from there. I feel better - I am just trying to do everything I can to prevent bad side effects. After dinner I got a call back from Jen Dore - my ostomy nurse - I had called her also to ask if she was interested in the samples I don't want and can't use. It was nice to hear a familiar voice and to tell her she was telling the truth - my ileostomy is not the end of the world - I won't go as far as saying i don't notice it but it really isn't as big of a deal as I thought it was going to be. I will take my samples with me on Tuesday and drop them for her - she will give them to people who don't have insurance or who want to try a different product.
Rob got Nick to bed early and I monogrammed Ellie's polished nails with "GOTR 2010" for the morning - she was pretty excited. I am still hoping the collective blowing will work and the rain will stop between 9 and say 10:30 tomorrow morning. My port incision is really buggin me right now - it feels like it wants to open up and eject the shiny purple port - I wonder if I picked prematurely? I guess it is time for some tylenol and a glass of wine. I am hoping for a fun morning tomorrow and that it isn't too cold and damp - I don't need to get sick and neither does Ellie - this isn't her weather for asthma. Visualising my healthy and continually healing body and the new normal me - whomever that shall be, Tree
* Collective rain blow, please!
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Good luck in the morning ladies...really picturing the two of you in a rain free GOTR 2010! You have the lidocaine. If the port area is really bugging you, put a little gel on. I'm not telling you to glob it on, but a little bit would probably do the trick. Hopefully you'll fall asleep earlier tonight, yes, probably on the couch, I know, but hopefully it will be earlier. Just in case we have fallen into some sensory exchange, I'll try to fall asleep earlier, too! Love you, sweetie...my thoughts are with you and Ellie for a great morning! Mom
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